People Photo Set

People Photo Set

Ask The Scotland Expert

Travelling Spaghetti Monster Scotland Expert

"I speak English fluently. Will I have any trouble communicating with the locals in Scotland?"

Communication in Scotland is not impossible for English speakers but is important to note that differences do exist. Note the difference in following example:
In Canada, one would say: 'Where is the train station?'
In Scotland, one would say: 'WHERE IS THE TRAIN STATION?'

City Guide: Glasgow

Glasgow is the capital of Scotland, the country that invented shouting, and is the third largest city in the English Kingdom. In Glasgow you can find a Starbucks easily, but it probably will not be open.

Run!

Belfast

In Belfast, a week went by very suddenly.

I rent a car and set out for Giant’s Causeway. The distances are small but the progress is slow as the narrow road is littered with tiny towns.

I stop at the Carrick-A-Rede rope bridge. In the past, the rope bridge enabled locals to access a superior fishing spot. Now it is the only place in Northern Ireland where you have to stand in line.

There, I meet an American teaching in Belfast. She says that she is planning to move to Vancouver if they “put another Bush in there.” She takes this picture while I explain how Al Gore is going to own the summer of 2006. The words please her but do not convince her. Note that I did not turn the conversation to politics, though I confess that the opportunity did not have to be offered twice.

Giant’s Causeway is an area of interlocking hexagonal basaltic columns. Maybe it is best if you just look at the pictures. This link will take you to an explanation of how the site formed, as understood by some eminent scienticians and geogolists.

Don't tell me it's a worthy cause,
No cause could be so worthy.

Dublin

Independently, Sarah and I scour our maps – we can find the Guinness Storehouse but not the road that we are on. Marty leads now. “This way,” he sets off. “I can smell it."

We are there quickly.

Tanzania Photo Set

Tanzania Photo Set

Kilimanjaro - Summit

Fredy seems unconcerned that Noelle, demonstrating the classic symptoms of altitude sickness, decides to turn back. He delegates her safety to Linus and Herman. This sudden responsibility rudely interrupts their inattentive ambling and joking. Dave chooses to accompany the descending group.

With less than two hundred metres to the crater rim, I press on with Fredy. He coaxes me to Gilman’s Point with a sequence of promises about how little distance remains. There, the mist shares little but I can see the crater floor which is covered in snow. The peak is reached through a climb of another two hundred metres along the crater rim. Climbers usually take about ninety minutes to complete this stretch but exhausted, I decide to stop here. I assure Fredy that I will be disappointed with this decision for the rest of my life. I keep this promise for about two weeks. We start down, running once we reach the soft sand.

Kilimanjaro - Rongai

Fredy is our guide and Herman and Linus are his assistants. Fredy is pleased to announce that he has saved us a few dollars by bringing only six porters when we had been expecting seven. Our support group numbers ten, a somewhat embarrassing total.

The Rongai route starts near the Kenyan border and scales the dry side of the mountain. The track starts in the corn fields at the edge of a village and climbs through forest and heather and into alpine desert. Ravens inhabit the entire mountain – even the summit if snack-fumbling climbers are present. The walk to the base camp takes three days - these days are marked by slow hiking, ample dinners and early bed-times.

At the end of the first day, Fredy drops by to announce that Linus has been demoted from assistant guide to senior porter. We fail to match Fredy’s interest in discussing this development at the time though the reason does become a source of curiosity later.

At the end of the second day, Fredy drops by to announce that we do not have enough porters in our group to ensure an adequate supply of water at the base camp. To resolve this unforeseen problem, he wants to discuss attempting to climb to the peak in a single day. Again, we fail to match Fredy's interest in having a conversation.

Arusha

The drinks bill arrives but features an obvious error. Dave checks with Achmed in the next room and he clears up the confusion. “I’m in for five,” he announces.

Question 10

Will we see The Crouch performed during the World Cup?

Value: 202 blerns for the correct answer. Deadline is 9 Jun 2006 23:59 PST.

In the event that The Crouch occurs, all contestants are eligible of a bonus of 50 blerns for performing it AT THE SAME TIME. No bonus is awarded for performing it in concert with tape-delayed broadcasts or highlight packages. Bonus claims will be awarded on the honour system, though eyewitness accounts are welcome.

Finally! Something on television that is worth watching...